Making a difference this Lent 2011 (Compassion Walk)
~Roughly 350 youths walking to downtown KL.~
Some people today seemed to be unable to accept and to love these people who are living amidst them. They have prejudice towards these people just because they are ‘problematic’ and different. And they’ll have nothing to do with these people.
And I would say part of our objective is to make them aware that these people are still human, not much different from who we are. They are capable of feeling hurt, unwanted, lonely, and depressed. 
The mission was simple, to put on the shirt, and ask people to HUG us. But the message to me, to the youth who followed the walk… was a powerful one. For to put on the shirt was to admit that, I am an addict, I am HIV-positive, I have AIDS, or I am an alcoholic. We, who donned the shirt, was to be in the position of these people. I’d approached total strangers, said this to them: ‘I am an addict, can you give me a hug?’’ and wait for them to give me that hug.
And for much of the time, they just walked away. And it struck me. The people we are portraying were experiencing the same thing. People shunned them off/despise them/avoid them because they are different. How would you feel if no one were to love you, to care for you, to show compassion to you? How would you feel if you approached someone for help and that person just walked away, much like how many of those whom we approached that afternoon did?
I’ve learnt (first-hand) that afternoon that the world could really use more love and compassion. I’ve learnt that I can no longer feel indifferent towards the sufferings of other people. There are tonnes of other people in need of help out there, the people we have portrayed, the homeless, the orphans but what have we done to help them.
~Preparing food and drinks, feeding the poor and homeless~
I gave food to the homeless earlier that day, watch them eat and listened to their stories of how they lived each day taking one step at a time. And their day can be a blessing or a curse for them, depending on how that day turned out. They might be having a warm night sleep by the roadside or they could be soaking wet when it rains. Yet, I realized they are as human as the rest of us. They have parents, siblings and friends. They still have hope and dreams for a better life. Some managed to maintain their dignity by which they really didn’t like to be termed ‘homeless’ or to be found scraping food and materials out of trash. They didn’t like to feel ‘sympathy’ from others because of their dignity and yet they don’t have a choice most of the time. Sometimes they were even taken advantage of, when their employers refused to pay them for the work they’ve done. The world that they lived in was a world that I could have never imagine being in. And yet they are still optimistic about their life. The homeless guy my group talked with was cheerful and even sang bits of songs for us.
Some of the participants from my group did a short sharing session a week after the ‘Walk’ and the facilitator mentioned that they had visited these the HIV-positive/AIDS patients in the hospitals and some of these patients were actually reluctant to talk with them. It was as if they had accepted the reality that they will be shunned by society and that to me is just a sad case.
I think its really about time we start to accept these people for who they are and to welcome them into society with open arms. To show them the love and compassion they seek. Because the world could use more of it.
Will you be making a difference this lent?
How to host a party?
What would you do if you are to host a party within 24 hours?
Perhaps a few important things will be
1) Loads of food
What type of a party would not be complete without food yeah? Be it snacks such as potato chips or tasty BBQ chicken… You’ll always need food at the party!!! Remember though to get sufficient food. Nothing is worst in a party than a bunch of hungry mob chasing you down for their fair share of food. And noone will enjoy having to get extra food from the outside after a party. PARTY=FOOD. You can never call it a party without food. PERIOD!!!
2) Loads of music/entertainment
Now the funny thing with a lot of people is that they rarely can have a meal/snacks without having something else to do. They will be talking to someone while eating, watching someone else about their things at a distance, fiddling about with their fork or spoon, watching the TV and eventually repeat the cycle all over again. Now as the host, you need to provide the proper thing to keep them occupied while their eating, be it someone else to talk with, some loud music, some belly dancers… anything which will keep them entertained throughout the party. You wouldn’t want your guest to be yawning at your party (aside from the yawns you get after partying for hours).
3) Loads of people
You have the food… You have the entertainment… And you noticed something is missing… Where is everyone? Take important note to invite all whom you could invite to the party (relevance is a point of consideration as well). Nothing stinks at a party more than the lack of people where 30 minutes into the party, you’ll be noticing that you had finished talking to everyone. And deciding whether you want to go through a 2nd round of talking or just call it a night. It wouldn’t hurt to have hot hunks and babes as these are crowd attractions.
Simple right?
*The writer of this post holds no responsibility if your party didn’t go how you would expect it to go*
The two things I shared about…
… during the CSSUPM Annual Camp 2010. I talked about what I felt during the Juniors’ Day a few months ago. I remembered walking around the chapel wondering how much longer will it stand. It has been a great part of my life for the last 5 years that I was here. But recently I’ve heard that some problems might cause the chapel to be a less prominent part of my life. I wondered, was it the end? But then I heard sounds, voices of the people who were singing inside the chapel. I saw faces of people whom some I’ve just seen for the first time that day. They all have just arrived in this humble little chapel of ours. They were smiling knowing not of all that the chapel had gone through or might have to go through. And it just struck me hard and deep. We must keep holding this family away from home firm. We must continue to keep this chapel standing. We who were here for so long had learnt so much during our time in this chapel, in this family. The memories we have we will bring along with us. And I thought those who are new to this family should also have a chance to experience what we had experienced. They should have a chance to live and love in this family, to make their own treasured memories in the chapel. They should have the chance to mature as how others and I have matured throughout our stay here. It’s just pitiful and definitely unfair if they don’t have the chance to do so. We need to keep this family together. Keep on learning about LOVE and learning about God. Because Christianity is the religion of love.
The second thing I shared about was what I felt after the Taize prayer session while sitting behind with Nova in the dark overlooking the silhouettes of the participants. I had a great sense of pride and happiness within me. The theme was ‘Quality time with our Lord’ and this is just what everyone is having right at that moment. And it was then that I told Nova that everything which they had done for the camp was all worth it. All the troubles, pains, and tears were nothing compared to that one moment. And I will always remember it.
What I’m trying to say here is that, sometimes the road is rough, and you are so worn out that you just can’t go on anymore. Do remember that it’s at these times when you will realize that there will be a moment which makes it all worth it. Keep looking for that moment. Just like a mother holding her newborn baby for the first time in her arms, do you think she will fret about the nine months of hardship she spent with the baby in the womb?
Think about it.
The Anger problem
Image via Wikipedia
I have an anger issue. Even my ex used to tell me about it. She said that I really have to control the anger which builds inside of me for no apparent reason. And I must apologize for letting her be the place where I release the swelling anger.
Anger has been swelling within me since Tuesday morning. Take this situation.
You are awaiting a parcel delivery from Citylink Express. The parcel was sent by the sender on Monday so tentatively, given that it’s express delivery, it should have reached the very next day. And so you waited the whole morning for that parcel. And it didn’t show. Alright then, perhaps they got sidetracked somewhere you thought. So on Wednesday, you called in to the hotline to ask where your parcel is. And so this girl’s voice told you that the parcel is on it’s way and tentatively will arrive before 5.30pm. Since you’re not feeling too well that day, you decided to wait for it. Fast forward and the clock shows 4.30pm. The elusive parcel was nowhere to be seen. So you made another call. And the girl’s say to have patience, that it will arrive before 5.30pm. And so we all ‘know’ what happens when 5.30pm arrives. No parcel. Next day, Thursday morning, you called once more, and this time the girl noticed that its you again. And so she takes down your address and number, says that she’s going to ask for the time the delivery man will stop by your place and then called you back. So you waited a while and still no call. So you decided to go to work and come back later when they finally called. Fast forward to lunch time. You received a call from the delivery man saying he’s outside your house. And that’s when you feel pissed. You tried to negotiate with him saying that you’ll rush back now but he says he got other delivery to make. And so you decided to tell him a particular time when you’ll be at home so that he can make a second delivery. This story is still ongoing at the time of typing so you’re now at home waiting for the guy to come back with your parcel.
Some might argue that, its okay to be pissed off and angry since it’s the problem with the delivery. Anyone would have been angry. But I have to consider that being pissed off and angry at the person now wouldn’t help me get my parcel sooner. So after going through a morning of raging anger, I had to force myself to calm down and think. And so I’ve asked him to come again politely, even inserting a ‘Terima Kasih’ (Thank You) at the end of my message. And I really hope that he comes or I might find difficulties controlling my rage again.
Anger is really something that destroys a person and the person’s relationship with everyone around him. I did have this argument sometime ago with a friend and taking note of those factors which fuels an argument really helps. But sometimes its hard cause even when you’re using the tips to resolve an argument, the other party just don’t understand what you’re trying to do.
Another instance will be a chat session a few nights ago. We were chatting about religion and the arguments she made really cause me to lose myself. So much so that I called her a ‘hypocrite’. And I really do regret using that word. I did apologize and thankfully things are ok.
I think that some of my anger management methods are working. At least, I acknowledge that the current me handles anger a lot better than the me a few years ago.
But still I definitely won’t be using Citylink anymore. And I suggest anyone reading this to think twice before going for Citylink. I’m just really dissatisfied with their service.
The boy who cried ‘Wolf’
Image via Wikipedia
I’m quite sure many of you would have heard of this Aesop’s fairy tale before
The Boy Who Cried Wolf
There once was a shepherd boy who was bored as he sat on the hillside watching the village sheep. To amuse himself he took a great breath and sang out, “Wolf! Wolf! The Wolf is chasing the sheep!”
The villagers came running up the hill to help the boy drive the wolf away. But when they arrived at the top of the hill, they found no wolf. The boy laughed at the sight of their angry faces.
“Don’t cry ‘wolf’, shepherd boy,” said the villagers, “when there’s no wolf!” They went grumbling back down the hill.
Later, the boy sang out again, “Wolf! Wolf! The wolf is chasing the sheep!” To his naughty delight, he watched the villagers run up the hill to help him drive the wolf away.
When the villagers saw no wolf they sternly said, “Save your frightened song for when there is really something wrong! Don’t cry ‘wolf’ when there is NO wolf!”
But the boy just grinned and watched them go grumbling down the hill once more.
Later, he saw a REAL wolf prowling about his flock. Alarmed, he leaped to his feet and sang out as loudly as he could, “Wolf! Wolf!”
But the villagers thought he was trying to fool them again, and so they didn’t come.
At sunset, everyone wondered why the shepherd boy hadn’t returned to the village with their sheep. They went up the hill to find the boy. They found him weeping.
“There really was a wolf here! The flock has scattered! I cried out, “Wolf!” Why didn’t you come?”
An old man tried to comfort the boy as they walked back to the village.
“We’ll help you look for the lost sheep in the morning,” he said, putting his arm around the youth, “Nobody believes a liar…even when he is telling the truth!”
The moral of this story is: Never tell lies. (Or whatever other moral values you perceive it to have)
Perhaps its cause the writer wrote it intending to teach that moral value to those reading it. But after thinking about it recently, I guess the reader might be able to perceive another side of the story.
He cried out because he was lonely, insecure and he did what he could to stop himself from feeling insecure. He wanted attention and he did what he could to get it. But those around him got a bit annoyed by his needs of attention. And when the wolf comes (I perceived as troubles), he cried the harder. But the previous securities whom he expects to come to his aid, didn’t help him at all.
I read the story and found a pitiful lonely boy.
But when you think about it, aren’t we quite similar to the boy who cried ‘Wolf’? Take away the things which make us feel secure. Take away the friends we are so bonded up with. Take away the partners we are living our lives with. Take away our internet connections and our mobile phones. Take away our wardrobe, our shoes, our fancy bags. Take away our pride and take away the fake-us we normally portray to others.
Underneath all those securities we hold on to, we will find the same boy who cries ‘Wolf’.
Don’t you think so?
But the most important thing is realize though is that, have you discovered the one ‘Old Man’ who’ll help you look for the lost sheep?
Think about it.
How the fireflies and a girl taught me something more about life.
I have to let myself settle down first before typing out this post. Because what I’m about to share really got me ‘emo’. Will be trying my best to share with you what I’m experiencing right now.
I wonder if you had come across this video clip on Youtube or on Facebook. Do have a look at it.
I’m not really good in Mandarin so I might not understand the whole story but I reckon I know enough to know what’s happening.
Anyway. I’m touched by her courage and her life-story. Even her outlook on life is touching. Life treats her unfairly, but she still managed to look on the brighter side of life. She believes she will have happiness. I wonder how many of us actually believes we will find true happiness, from the bottom of our hearts. We often give up and feel undetermined by the tiniest things, but this ‘young-looking’ girl reminds us that there are a lot more things in life to feel grateful for. To keep on looking forward with your head held high no matter what befalls us.
Thank you for teaching me something about life today.
Attending the IDERN 2010 seminar.
I’ve been attending this seminar called IDERN 2010 for the past few days. It’s the short form for International Doctoral Educational Research Network, bringing supervisors and postgraduate students from all over the globe to discuss about postgraduate studies.
In a lot of ways, I would have like it more if I had attended this before I started my PhD 2 years ago because it would have given me a clearer picture over how and what studying PhD would be like.
I like to quote one of the speakers who said
PhD- you are responsible for the independent research in the field while being properly supervised.
This means that you are responsible for everything you do from the first step onwards, not your supervisor. This particular responsibility I had experienced it first hand, be it being efficient to carry out my study or be it missing deadlines due to personal problems, everything was my responsibility, and I can’t say that it’s not my fault because everything that happen since that day 2 years ago is under my care.
Another particular thing which I just had to quote was this
In the beginning, you would know nothing, and your supervisor will know everything. After 3 years, you will know almost everything and your supervisor, almost nothing
Think about it.
Well anyway, I’ve learnt loads from the seminars held, from dealing with your supervisors to defending the viva. I won’t be sharing any here because it will take a lot of writing space.
Perhaps the only thing I would write about is this.
Postgraduate study is like your undergraduate study, multiplied ten-folds, add-in a few folds of stress and problems, subtracting all the help you may have gotten in your undergraduate years and you’ll find time as a fraction of what it used to be.
So be prepared, my dear juniors who are about to journey down this road. But do remember one thing though, please do have a life while studying because sometimes a pinch of fun allows for more efficient work.
Have fun studying 
Here’s some other things from the seminar that I would like to share: (Sources are in brackets)
The secret life of the PhD student
You’re sitting at your desk ready to start writing; it’s 9.30 a.m. You think, “I’ll just check my emails for 10 minutes and then I’ll get started on my literature review.” You open up your email and find there’s one from your supervisor asking if your draft is ready. You quickly send it to the trash and check the next one. It’s from an honours student in your department saying they can’t find a particular reference and since it’s your field do you know where to find it. You think, “It’ll only take a few minutes, I’ll just do a quick check.” So you log onto to the library electronic journals. Eventually, with a sense of great satisfaction, it’s found and emailed off to the grateful honours student. It’s 10.15 a.m. “Well,” you think, “I may as well just get the rest of these emails cleared”; glassware not cleaned in lab yesterday – send back saying it wasn’t me; astronomical society bash tonight – send back saying sorry, can’t come; interesting reference from co-supervisor –send back saying thanks, and go look up reference – feel very satisfied when found, printed, stapled and put in pile with 40 other articles. It is now 11.00 a.m. “Well, it’s been a busy morning, surely it’s time for a cup of coffee.” You meet a few friends in the coffee room and chat about the latest techniques for grafting boils to blue tongued sleepy lizards. It’s 11.30 a.m. As it’s only an hour until lunch you think there’s not much point in trying to start the lit review now, so you organise some references and put them into Endnote. It’s 12.30 p.m. and, with a sigh of relief, you head off for lunch. At 1.30 p.m. you come back and now feel a little tired, so think ‘I’ll just do something a bit easy until I feel more motivated.’ It’s 2.30 p.m. and another PhD student knocks on the door and asks for help with calibrating her super-sensitive bio-liquid. You are really good at this so you help and, after all, she’s helped you with Endnote in the past. After this you rush back into your office. It’s 4.30 p.m. You’re late, so you shut down your computer, grab your bag and rush out.
Your supervisor walks past and asks you how your day was. You say, “Great – very busy, did a lot”, but you have to rush now because you’re late for a meeting of the Faculty Higher Degrees Completion Committee and you are its representative!(Kearns et al., 2008)
Do inform me if it’s inappropriate to post this here and I’ll take it down.
What is written in the secret lives of a PhD student is really quite true
And the second one is a comic by Jorge Cham which is also quite true.
Lol. Have an idea what’s postgraduate studies is like yet?
Get a DSLR only when…
I’ve heard a lot of people wishing to get a DSLR, mainly because
- They think its cool to lug around a DSLR
- They think that all the photos you take with a DSLR will be great photos
- They think that they can just use the Auto settings on a DSLR and everything will turn out fine.
- They are really photography enthusiasts who really learn a lot of things before settling down with a DSLR [And these are the people who knows how to read up on photography related topics etc]
If you are planning to spend for a DSLR and you are in category 1, 2, or 3, and NOT in category 4, then please do not waste your money on a DSLR.
On the contrary to what those in Category 1, 2 or 3 believe, it is not easy to use a DSLR. It’s heavy, the lens work funnily sometimes, focus is sometimes off when you’re using manual focus, some lens won’t work on certain DSLR, you might not get used to looking through the viewfinder [even though some DSLR have live-view function, I found that for the D90 there’s a slight delay in live-view which really spoils a lot of things], and most of all, you’ll need a lot of practice and read-ups to be good in using it [and that definitely means reading the manual- Only sadly I’ve seen very little friends of mine who owns a digital camera and still do not read the manual, till in the end, they didn’t know how much their digital camera can actually do].
Only consider a DSLR when you know what the following means and how each of them relate which each other.
- Exposure
- Shutter Speed
- ISO
- Aperture
- F-stop
- Spot, center weighted metering
- Macro
- Noise
If you don’t know any one of the above I would suggest for you to read up [go online and do a search on it]. Some camera’s manual settings will give you control [to an extent] on the above settings. You don’t need a DSLR to learn about the above.
Lets say for example, if you would want to take photos at night, what should you do. Turn on night mode and everything will be preset for you. But handshake might still remain a problem. How about using manual settings at night to take photos with natural lighting, what should you do? [Longer shutter speed possibly with a tripod, with high ISO to compensate so that you will be able to make things brighter- with higher noise of course, no flash unless absolutely necessary, low level of aperture perhaps f-stop of f/2.8, and pray that you’ll get a nice photo]
There are a lot of things one should learn before going for a DSLR, and moving along with the trend [by which more and more people are making the transition to DSLR] is NOT a good idea.
Please learn, unlock the full potential of your digital camera [if you have one], know its limitations, know its potential, know what you lack and find ways to compensate for it, and definitely read the manual if you have time.
Only after you’ve learn how to use the digital camera should you consider buying a DSLR. And when I say learn I don’t mean using Auto function and just snap away. Experience with the manual settings, play around and try new things. You’ll never know what your digital camera can do. I used my digital camera almost 3 quarters of a month, every month for 2 years [mostly in manual settings] before I got a DSLR. And honestly, it’s still hard to use the DSLR after all that practice.
So please, do some homework before buying so that you won’t blame the DSLR when all you get is lousy photos.
That being said, I will share my experience with Esme [My D90] soon. Perhaps you will be able to see what I’ve gone through with the DSLR.
PS: Correct me if I’m wrong with some of the info. I’m still learning as well
Now I See! Spiritual Revival Concert 2010
I’ve went to attended the Now I See! Spiritual Revival Concert organized by ICM. It’s all thanks to Liannie and some juniors for ‘bringing’ me to the concert. It was held in New Era College, Kajang on the 20th of March 2010.
It was really an enjoyable experience, a bit different from what I would have expected but still enjoyable nevertheless. I really do enjoy the Praise and Worship session [a bit similar to what is done in CSS, except most of the time we in CSS tends to loosen up too much] and the drama act. And I also do enjoy the energetic dances put up by the dancers [Liannie included]
Unfortunately I had to go early because I have other obligations to fulfill [obligations as in to fetch some juniors to the balloon fiesta in Putrajaya]. So I think I wouldn’t be qualified to say that I have had the full experience.
Honestly though, it managed to open my eyes a bit towards my own spiritual faith and perhaps I might join in more activities in the near future. Also, I would enjoy being a photographer for their upcoming activities [Invites, anyone?]
Here are some photos of the event [Some of the photos was improperly exposed since I’m still not used to the external flash unit of my camera]
All the photos you’ve seen here would have already been pasted on Facebook.
Would you still love her/him if…?
A friend of mine [JulianaOoi] asked me this question a few weeks back. The conversation went something like this?
Ju: Will you still love the person [you’re loving] if the circumstances was different?
Alan: How different do you mean?
Ju: How about if the girl has a terminal illness and only have a few months left. Will you still love her, cherish her and will you still be with her if you found out about this?
Alan: [deep in thoughts]
Ju: Then, how about if the girl have AIDS. Will you still love her the way you do now? Will you still be determined to be with her for the rest of whatever days you both may have together?
Alan: [again deep in thoughts]
Honestly the question caught me unprepared.
Perhaps most of us will argue that things like that don’t happen most of the time, but it still may happen. And if it does, what would you do about it?
I remembered what I had answered to Ju that night. And perhaps given the current state of things, I’ll keep what I answered Ju to myself.
But what I will like to know is that, what will you do?
Will you keep holding on?
The lives that passes on…
I heard about the news last night. I’m not really sure what to feel since I’m not close with the person nor do I know her well enough. But for me, even if you barely know each other, the death of someone close to those around you will be felt. And so I’m writing with the feelings I’ve felt for my friends who have lost a friend.
I can relate what I felt when a close friend of mine committed suicide. I cried. The tears won’t stop. I cried when I saw his body in the coffin, unmoving, silent and cold. I cried because I know I’m not a good friend for not being there for him when he needed friends the most. I cried in front of strangers whom I didn’t know and in front of friends whom I know. I cried in front of my mother who haven’t seen me lost control like that before. And I saw friends of mine, whom are always able to control their emotions, and they broke down as well. And in the end, all we could see was sadness. There was no joy in that place that day.
That was one experience I had with death. And eventually I realize that we do have to cherish those around us. Be it the person whom rejected you for being an admirer, a friend whom you had an argument with, or even just the friendly cashier you normally see in an eatery. Life is unpredictable, it is as fragile as candle flame on a windy day. So many times we heard others talking about how fragile life is. And so many times we agreed to it. And more are the times when we forget about it over and over again.
Perhaps each passing of life is a reminder that life is always going on, even if you didn’t realize it, until it is gone one day. And when will be the day when we finally do not need the passing of friends to remind us of that?
5 tips to resolve an argument
I argued with a good friend recently until both of us left fuming in the end. The reason? A difference in thoughts and a minor misunderstanding. Those who truly know me will know that I stand very very strongly on what I believe in, be it friendship, love, relationship, trust etc. And I will defend very very strongly on those who try to stamp on my believes.
And we left fuming for a day. I found that even the minor things influence me quite easily when I get angry. The argument continued the next day because of a Facebook status update. [Funny right?]
Anyway, it was resolved in the end. It took a lot of patience but it reached that point in the end. And I found out that one must really comply to a few rules to settle an argument.
1. Never ever talk at the same time. [The resolution happened through FBChat as well; I started by asking her to give me a moment to talk. And everytime she interrupted, I spam ‘WAIT’ till she keep quiet.] Reason is that I realize that when both of us are chatting, none of us are actually reading what the other is typing. That’s no way to solve an argument. Also remember to give the other party a chance to talk and do not interrupt.
2. Be humble. Accept the fact that you CAN be wrong. That is very important. If you are wrong and you know you are, be humble and admit you are wrong. Say sorry and then try to explain what you wanted to say, but in a nice way. There may be times when you aren’t wrong at all but if the other party do not want to admit their fault, you shouldn’t force them to. Accept it if they do not want to admit their wrongs. Its either you apologize or you forgive. One party must be tolerant to either say sorry or forgive the other.
3. Do not use sarcasm or criticize the other party. Sarcasm and critics will just add fuel to the fire. Refrain from doing so. Most of us will tend to criticize and be sarcastic when we are angry. So I will suggest for you to take long deep breathes and keep your anger under control. And when one is angry they will most probably relate everything the other say as sarcasm or criticism. Keep your head cool.
4. There’s no such things as letting the fire cool down [unless you are talking years of cooling down]. Things will sure to ignite again every now and then so long as the misunderstanding remains. It may be a good idea to resolve the misunderstanding before it accumulates and another war of words begin. It’s a bit like Neyo’s Mad- And I don’t want to go to bed, Mad at you. So try to resolve the argument as soon as you can, but properly.
5. Make sure there are no interruptions during the resolution. Settle the argument before focusing on anything else. Give your full focus towards settling the argument.
I’ll make it simple with these 5 points first. It should be sufficient to resolve an argument [hopefully I’m not wrong or I’ll end up getting flamed here]
What is love?
An open discussion.
Please submit your views on the comments sections.
Somethings happen to me today which made me doubt whether I know what love really is.
The cycle of kindness
Kindness, part of a greater meaning called ‘Love’ *Credits to Rufina for allowing me to use this photo*
I did share a bit on the kindness as one of the habits of ‘Love as a way of life’ previously in one of my older post.
Recently I’ve been asking myself how sometimes certain people do not appreciate the kindness that others show to them. It made me ponder a bit on whether the people should show kindness in the first place, since kindness if not appreciated will go to waste.
But only after a while did I realize that kindness will never be wasted. Sure, certain people may not know how to appreciate kindness that kindness will eventually pass on from them to someone else when they show kindness. And the flow continues like that.
So even though some people do not wish to receive kindness, perhaps they just didn’t realize that the kindness they receive from others may have been passed on by you.
It doesn’t really matter if you can’t do something for a person. Showing kindness to those around them will be enough and eventually the kindness you’ve shown to these people will pass on to that person.
So just remember. Be kind
My statistics test results
I’m taking the course Health Statistics this semester and there was this paper which I had to take a few weeks back. Honestly I haven’t had a paper in quite a while so preparing for it didn’t go too well.
The results came out 2 days ago.
And, I did quite well statistically. That is to mean that my score is within the upper limits of a normal distribution.
Which means that I got quite a high mark compare to the average the class got.
But note that I said ‘I did quite well STATISTICALLY’
Reality wise, the mean average of what the class got was so low that the upper limits didn’t seem quite ‘Upper’ at all.
Its a bit like knowing that you did well in your class… But then finding out that the average in your class is a Score D. Which means that your score is somewhere within B- or B.
Glad to know that I’m learning something statistically even though my marks are damn low.
Dear Miss N,
*This is a delayed entry.*
Dear Miss N,
I’m typing this while waiting for the moment to fetch you from the bus station.
I guess I must be thankful for remembering that you are coming back today. I must be thankful for taking the courage to sms you and offer my help to you. Honestly I thought that my sms will be somewhat like the most of what I’ve sent before, without a reply, but well, you did reply and you did accepted my offer for help (even if you did give me reasons and conditions for it). Honestly I don’t mind doing this for you even if you did somewhat ignored me for the past few months. I’m glad I still keep believing that things will be better and didn’t give in to my sadness and anger. You might not know how many times I almost gave in, especially to the latter.
I’m going to be fetching an angry person later. I do hope that person don’t lashed out at me. Haha. I remember someone very dear to me once said. Don’t let your anger consume you. (That person was my ex) She understands that I was a person who let anger get the best of me, especially during my undergraduate years. And many times I just felt depressed and tired after all unleashing all those anger. I’m not in a position to judge you nor do I know what’s going on with your life. But I do want you to know the one thing I found out all those years ago. Feeling anger does not help with things. You’ll only get tired and stress out in the end. It won’t help you with in the relationship with the person you are angry with and it will ruin the relationships you do have with others around you. She helped me out with those words and I in turn hope that these words will help you out as well. Life’s a bitch sometimes but life will be much more of a bitch if you let your anger take control of you.
And honestly I am happy today because things seemed to be looking better after the “cold-war” all these months. I just hope that things will continue to get better as time pass. And I do hope I remember to keep my mouth zipped later while fetching you. Though you might not want to hear this since you seem to loathe and despise this place but still, welcome back. And I look forward to tasting that cupcake. Haha. Cheers.
Alan
*I guess I won’t have the chance to eat that cupcake. Haha. Miss N messaged me a few moment ago saying that she has found some other friends on the bus and will share a taxi with them. Somehow I did look forward to fetching the angry girl back but seems like its not this time. Sigh. I do hope that this is not another bad sign though.*
Bible sharing session: True Disciples
I went to the bible sharing session last Wednesday night. Even though only a few turned up, it didn’t stop the bible sharing session from going on…
Perhaps before my own sharing on what I thought on the topic, I should let you have a read that the reading that day.
Ok. The title of the reading was ‘True Disciples’
Frankly when Scholestica read the reading out, I didn’t really managed to concentrate… Perhaps it was because I was tired, perhaps it was kind of hard to grasp the meaning of the reading and how it was reflected in my life… It wasn’t until Arthur did his sharing that I started grasping the meaning of the reading.
If you had read the reading (link above), perhaps you will come to the same question which I had… Which was… What makes a True Disciple?
Jesus was preaching to the Jews that only by remaining in His words will they be true disciples and be set free… And the crowd responded by saying that they were never enslaved, so why they not free…?
This particular phrase got me thinking… In the world now… How many of us are truly free? How many of us can confidently say that they are not chained down… That they are ‘free people’…? At least I don’t think so I am one of those free people…
Everyday, I felt that I’m clung down by my obligations, the things I do, the challenges I face, the feelings of mine, etc… I felt burdened with what I have to do to get through my life… I may feel lost at time… Unsure of what to do or what could be done… So… Am I free?
Jesus replied them that whoever that commit sins are slaves of sins and hence not free at all… But I don’t think that sins are all that enslave us nowadays… How many of us got enslaved by what’s around us? By excitement, by food (like me), by our addictions…? I think if we are enslaved by those menial things, we couldn’t be called as free people… Then how can we be free???
Then I thought some more of the times when I felt free… Felt free of worries… Felt happy as if there is nothing that will bring my world down at that time… But those particular sessions were also short-lived…
Many of us may also have the wrong perception on freedom… Freedom when we arrived in University… Finally out of the place where we had lived for the more than half of our life… But then that isn’t the freedom which Jesus means… Neither is the freedom which you felt after examination… Or after finishing your Final Year Project…
And then I thought of my life thus far… From studying hard from secondary school… To fulfilling obligations attending class and labs in University… From being engulfed in troublesome conditions and challenges, to being tested to do the right thing everywhere… I felt myself chained down daily… Doing things that now seemed trivial and meaningless… Perhaps what we comprehend as important in this life will never be permanent… And that sooner or later, we will be chained down again… Unable to find that freedom that most of us longed for…
What I think Jesus meant in that reading is eternal freedom… Where you won’t be clung down anymore by your daily life… And as He said it… “If you remain in my word, you will truly be my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”… Perhaps if we really remain in His words, we will be able to find true freedom. But what does it mean to remain in His words?… Perhaps giving ourselves totally to Him… Not partially but rather… In whole… And perhaps through that, we will be able to slowly discover the freedom that we are looking for.
Well, that what I get from the short bible sharing that we had… Perhaps my interpretation of the reading may not be accurate at all… But this is just a sharing of what I felt… I hope it wasn’t too bad since it’s really a first time for me to be doing this…
And the second half of the reading seems a bit hard to comprehend that I don’t really understand what it means… Anyone mind to clarify with me what that means?
Earth Hour at St Anne’s Chapel, UPM
Earth Hour has come and gone… Have you done your part?
And for those who did do their part… What did you do during that one hour of darkness??
Hope it was something special.
I was at St. Anne’s chapel during Earth Hour, attending the mass there. The recent electrical problems in the chapel made the Earth Hour this year very natural and longer than the supposed ‘hour’.
The chapel was in darkness for the whole 2-3 hours that the mass was held because we couldn’t turn on the electricity even if we wanted to.
But then, it was special nevertheless…
Where else could you celebrate mass in candle light aside from during the Easter Triduum…
So here’s a few photos of the night
~It was pitch black…Lol… Imagine if all the photos were like this…~
But then… They’re not…
~Preparing for mass… It was still bright outside~
~It might be hard for the musician to play the music in the candle light…~
~And so more candles were lit up for them~
~Sky outside has finally turn dark~
~Dominic’s praying~
~Some changes in camera setting while the rosary was on-going~
~And the candle kept on burning~
~And burning…~
~And burning… (I like the hand movement effect in this photo)~
Earth Hour is finally over… But what we did on that night (all the turning off the lights and ‘saving’ energy)… Did we did it because it was the in-thing of that moment? Did we all turn off the lights because everyone else is doing it? Because the radio stations, the newspapers were telling you to? Because your friends are telling you to?
Then after the hour is over, do we just go on back to our normal lifestyle? Being how we were before and thinking that since the hour is over… We can just do what we want once more… Does it end just like that?
Earth Hour was carried out to teach you something… And the only question that I really think you should answer now is… ‘Have you learn anything new?’
The difference between Married Couples and Dating Couples
I am reading the book called ‘The Five Love Languages’… Found it really true and helpful… Haha… Anyway… I’m quoting something in there here… Perhaps for you all to think about and to discuss… (If we do make it to the discussion part that is)
Have you ever noticed that in a restaurant, you can almost always tell the difference between a dating couple and a married couple? Dating couples look at each other and talk. Married couples sit there and gaze around the restaurant. You’d think they went there to eat.
Which I think is quite true for the married couples that have found their love fading away…
What do you think?
The best book in the world
I came upon this book a few months back
The book is found at ‘Borders’ at The Gardens, KL.
Everthing Men Know About Women by Prof Alan Francis…
The title really caught my eye so I couldn’t resist to pick it up and have a look at it
Prof. Alan Francis is America’s Foremost Psychologist.. So what he has written must be a gem… He must have done loads of research as to what men really know about women right…
Even the back side of the book shows all the research that he had conducted…
Somemore
Millons of copies have been sold and its translated into 12 language… OMG… This must be a gem among all other books…
Times rated it at 4 stars… And the Chronicles mentioned that this book ‘Says it all!’
Topics include…
Making friends with women, romancing women, achieving emotional intimacy with women, making commitments to women and satisfying women in bed somemore… All priced at a mere RM19.90…
How good can it get…
So we flipped open the book and
And a few more pages
Its so true… Don’t you think so too??
Something from somewhere
Got this short snippet from a random blog…
He changed
giving her small compliments at breakfast such as:
"I lilke the way your hair looks" or
"Nice dress."
She wondered
"What is he doing?"
But she also knew she liked his words.
So as the days continued
she responded
and acts of kindness became more common.
He changed
she changed
They changed
And it was for the better
-Gladding, 1996-
It just sounds so nice… Maybe I should do something like that too… But to who ya??
If lying is a sin, then is lying to yourself wrong?
Something to think about…
How many of you ever been in this situation…? You have the hots for someone… And this particular someone was a friend for quite sometime… But the hots you’re feeling only started… Then, you found out that this particular someone is seeing someone else… And they’ve started dating and all sorts… Now… What will you do??? a) Keep on being close with her, treating her with gifts, making her touched and hope that she’ll change her heart?? or b) Let go and say that you’re doing that because you love her and that you just want her to be happy…
Think about it…
If you choose a)… You may start to be annoying to her and she will see your stubbornness and persistence and anything could happen here… From falling out of friendships or even her changing heart…
and
If you choose b)… There is of course only one ending to this, since you’re backing off… Being noble and the one who ‘love’ you made the sacrifice… What to do… You love her what…
So here’s the catch to those who answered b)… Are you really that noble??? My dear friend, can you look into my eye and say that it’s ok to let go… That you’re really feeling that its fine?? That you won’t feel bad when you see her with him… Can you look me in the eye and say that you can live with the decision that you make??? Can you be honest and say you aren’t lying to yourself and that the decision you made is NOT the decision you want?
So tell me then… What will you do??
Updated: Barely a few hours after updating this post, I listened to a sermon at HFK which was about talents. The parable of the talents go something like this. A master give his servant 5,3 and 1 talent respectively and went away. The servant with 5 talents put his talents to good use and ended up with 5 more talents. The one with 3 did the same and got 3 extra talents. But the servant with 1 talent hid his talent and didn’t earn anything out of it. When the master returned, the servant with 5 talents and 3 talents showed him what they earned and the master said that they proved themself loyal and faithful and entrust them with more things. But the servant with 1 talent got sent off and stripped of his only talent because he was fearful of losing that talent. The parable went on something like this, ‘For the one who has will be given more, and he will have more than enough. But the one who does not have, even what he has will be taken from him.’
So I thought… Everyone has gotten their own talents… Regardless of how bad or terrible they are in something… Perhaps by taking the risk to use this one talent, they will earn something else in return… Take the risk and you might have something even better… So perhaps you can just go after the girl with that one talent of yours… That one goodness you know you have in you… Even though it might have been too late… Cuz only those who risk it will have the chance to gain more… Take the safe path and whatever chance you have will be lost.
So I guess I’ll choose the first choice if it was me…. But still… Just wanna know what you all think…
