~minors n’ MAJORS~

Anyway dunno whether this is good news or not but I won’t be going of to UMS… Cuz the appeal didn’t make it… Haha.. When mum told me I was like ‘YES’ … Lol… Didn’t liked going there much… Liked here more cuz its really a lot better lor…

Erm I am really wondering now… What can I do when I come out of this course… Its like doing research I know but how many are actually getting jobs  out there…. Another hard thing to think about… And even though I happy I have more things to think about…Bummer… Anyway Justina should be happy cuz I am staying… Even Lei Hong is… Haha… She said she wished for me to stay but encourage me to go… It seemed that her wish had came true…Now I can finally start buying books without second thoughts and start studying… I am sooo Lazy now… Cuz really tiring lo studying….

Erm :NEWSBREAK: I touch a dead body already.. Lol… during class yesterday…. The body was already half rotten and freezing cold… We had to determine which muscle was which and to know wheres the liver, heart etc etc etc… Lol… Sounds like fun but the smell was sooo damn strong… Its not the body but the formalin they use… Like bringing me to tears…

Hmmm… I wonder how the others are doing and hope you all got received my mail… I sent one email yesterday… Keep reading here for updates… Ok? Miss you guys and girls….

Erm… What to say ah… Dunno la…. Just added a lot of pictures on the photo album… Go view… Haha

Anyway Life in UPM is still good… I just ran in a 7.5 km jogathon yesterday and didn’t faint…. Hahaha.. Very lucky ler…~~ But the important thing is not last also… About the middle batch… Haha… Kembang already… really tiring… And then go out to shopping again in Midvalley and Mines… with Shirley, Ming Huey and Gi Ni… But I spend a lot more on food than on shopping…. Lol… Ate Banana Split, Chicken Chop and McD… So full and getting fatter everyday…

Anyway… Speak about something else la… The result of the appeal… If I really do get the appeal, I really DON’T want to go you know…. Why? Maybe fall in love with here already.. Haha.. No lahhh… Maybe becoz I feel that I am really not suit for medic lo… Maybe will cont to study BMEDIC here since I found out its really actually not bad…. Anyway Consider this .. Medic is 5 yrs here… While Bmed only 3 years… Medic after 5 yrs have to go work in Gov hosp be4 going to go for specialist… But if I get good grades for Bmed I can go straight into PhD after 3 yrs… That means that I can save the Master time of 2 years… That means that by the time the Doctors come out… I am already a PhD and the doctors still have to work at gov Hosp b4 going to do specialist or private or anything…. and another reason is I am REALLY LAZY… pls la… If I take medic it will means… Xong xi like that lo…. Really frust over this matter…. And I really actually start to like the conditions here even though a little erm not peaceful esp in KL but all’s well in UPM…. So still waiting and actually hoping not to get it… Lol Haha

Really sorry SS… KTY… Cuz of what I am going to say…

Anyway got to go soon cuz have to go find my seniors signature… Till next time Bye bye

Hmm… How to start…? You know after all this time of me saying that I am not going to be so immature anymore and that I am going to be better and thinking like a mature person for once… I just realized that after all this time… I am still the old me… Not changing… No matter how hard I wanted and I try to change it just seemed useless… My feelings. My thoughts… When can I finally control them… Its like I am just an emotional time bomb with its clock ticking closer and closer to 0.00… Just for once… I am thinking… Why can’t I think differently… Why can’t I just feel differently for once…. Never had I been able to control the different emotions that came across me… Whether its sadness… Happiness, Jealousy.. Love… Sorrow… etc etc …. I can never seemed to control what I feel… Say the easiest example…. I can easily hate a person for some minor thing she did… And she still treat me indifferently… It just make me feel somewhat sad for my own actions… My own thoughts… Very pai seh lo…. Its like because she seemed more and more sombong (or perhaps Its because I am just jealous that she is less erm friendly with me) but she still treats me like a friend… and now I am feeling so guilty for what I had said regarding her… Really very very sorry Shley… Really very sorry…

As I think back on all that I had did… It really makes me start to despise even myself… Its like why am I being so immature… so I had made up a decision… that is until the day when I am finally able to think through my emotions… my thoughts rationally and being able to control them and from that day onwards only can I label myself as a mature person….

Hmm… for those of you who read and reread what I had just typed and didn’t understand even a word that I was trying to say then forget it…. All the ranting… Its just all the confusion in my mind when I am troubled, disturbed or unhappy… Very blurry isn’t it… Doubt anyone who read it and not know me will understand it… Lol~~~

Anyway… another thing that is troubling me for the past few days is ‘I HATE BEING YOUNG’… Why you ask? Its just because really sien lo being young… All the people here are that a lot more older than me and it just make me feel a lot more inferior and small you know…. Sigh~~~ Its gonna be so hard to settle down here….

Anyway talking about the appeal to UMS… I am really kinda changing my mind as to not to go at all… Cuz this place is really not so bad you know… And after all this time… Trying to settle down… Make friends etc… Moving to another place will be even harder to settle down…. And the course is gonna be a lot harder too.. I don’t think I will be able to cope with it… Come to think of it now… The people here are really nice… Lol… Made some good friends (Onion) Became better friends with those who I wasn’t close with last time (Shirley)… And after going through all this it will be really sad to leave… Really sad to…Sigh… But do I have a choice? That I won’t know till the results are out….

Anyway… Erm… I doubt you’ll be able to read it…. But Tina… Get well soon… Go get some sleep la… And don’t listen to all those rumors… I think you know what I am talking about la… If you happen to read it anyway la…. Just I wish you to get well soon…

Erm have to say loads of thanks to Shirley and Ming Hui once more.. Thanks to you two I am able to get the latest copy of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince… Love you two… Been reading it for two days already and now at the last few chapters… Lol… Emm… *Spoiler alert* Ming Hui said that at the end of the story Dumbledore will die lo… Sad sad sad… But anyway… one of the happiest thing that I read so far was about Harry and Ginny…. They are meeting each other again… And had a great kiss in front of many people… Haha… I’ve been rooting for those two for quite some time already and its nice to know they are finally making some progress…

Got some other things on my mind that I am not sure whether should be said or not… Maybe I will type it in here once I think about it more cuz its really quite a serious thing… And dunno any of you have noticed it yet… But this blog has a few secrets… Try to find out for yourself… Going to upload loads of new pictures soon into the photo album about the time I was at the orientation, party etc… Lol… But will only be able to put in a max of 50 photos… Bummer…

Anyway… Last thing to say… The update this time is being typed over a two days period… Because I can get into Friendster from this computer … Another Bummer again…Sigh… This update is actually made on the 18th to the 20th of July.. So if the facts seems to ran off after a while… Sorry~~~

Final message to friends… Ex-classmates… Yhong Kching Mas Cindy , Ex- roommates… Brother Dy, Nzul, Dullah…. Ex-Matrix Classmate and friends…. Aldrin, Audrey, Oscar, Hanna, Rosie… And everyone else that I know…. Miss you all a lot… Guess that’s it…. BYE BYE.

Haha Lol… Long time no hear from me… Now lucky cuz got sometime to type something la…  UPM Serdang… the place is just BIG….  Very Big … Just too big.. There is just too many things to say here… Anyway I am fitting in quite well…. The people here are good and nice also… My roommate an Indian is also a funny guy la…. Hmmm Will be sad if I’m gonna leave here cuz starting to like the place… Bio medic is also not a bad course to take…. Dunno whether hows the appealing thing going on now… But if i get it I wont be sure whether I will go back to UMS or not… Sigh…~~ So many things on my mind now…

Anyway… The orientation week here has been tiring…. Imagine we had a week’s of university orientation and then two stimultanious orientation going on this week that is for our faculty and our college…. Yesterday got treasure hunt and it was one of the best I had ever been in… And one of the dirtiest also…. At the end of it.. I had flour and red paint all over my face…. Why? … Guess yourselves…. Anyway…. I will make more updates when I have the time… You have anything you want to tell me just leave it on the comment section… I am sure to reply de… Okay… Thats all la… Bye bye…

By the way for those who dunno yet… SS means Special Someone